Driving in the Dark: A Childhood Memoir, by Zoe Niklas, Janice Harper
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Driving in the Dark: A Childhood Memoir, by Zoe Niklas, Janice Harper
Free Ebook PDF Driving in the Dark: A Childhood Memoir, by Zoe Niklas, Janice Harper
While most kids are served home-cooked dinners and tucked in with bedtime stories at night, Mary Zoe never knows which version of her mother, Zodie, to expect. She might be dressed to the nines, rhapsodizing about a more luxurious way of life; or she might be strewn naked on the floor, slumped into unconsciousness by drugs and alcohol.
But either way, Mary Zoe has known from an early age that she wants a better life: freedom from the squalor, the forever-empty cupboards, and the endless parade of abusive men, tranquilizers, and booze. And when Mary Zoe’s older sister, Sissy, leaves the household, Zodie’s behavior spins even further out of control.
Coming to the painful realization that staying with her mother would mean danger, Mary Zoe crafts a plan to escape the household and leave the mother—who she loves, but who has hurt her so deeply—behind. Set in the 1960s, few people intervene to help Mary Zoe, so she learns to seek help on her own. When she is taken into foster care by a loving, stable family, she thinks her problems have finally been solved. Instead, she finds herself caught in a nightmarish court system that leaves her torn between the family she knows will love and protect her, and the damaged mother she loves but knows is certain danger.
A thrilling true story of courage and survival, Driving in the Dark documents the harrowing abuse and neglect that filled Zoe Niklas’s childhood, as well as her path to overcoming these devastating events.
Driving in the Dark: A Childhood Memoir, by Zoe Niklas, Janice Harper- Amazon Sales Rank: #476574 in eBooks
- Published on: 2015-11-29
- Released on: 2015-11-29
- Format: Kindle eBook
About the Author
Zoe Niklas is a graduate of Whitman College, where she received her bachelor’s degree in dramatic arts. She has been married for forty years to her college sweetheart, and together they have one son and two grandchildren.
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Most helpful customer reviews
4 of 4 people found the following review helpful. Everyone should read this book!! By Linda L Schmale-Tate DRIVING IN THE DARK, by Zoe Niklas, with Janice HarperEveryone should read this book!Zoe Niklas’ Driving in the Dark is a heartfelt cry on behalf of abused and neglected children everywhere – but her story is also a strong tribute to the power of love and determination. This book, a true story, is a must-read for parents, for counseling professionals, for book clubs, for clergy, and for anyone else who has anything to do with children, or who has ever been a child.Many of us think that we have been short-changed by our parents – but most of us don’t realize how lucky we have been, and reading this story is a salutary shock. Subjected to physical abuse, neglect, and cruel criticism by her mother, a drug and alcohol addict, and sexually abused by one of a series of stepfathers, Zoe fought her way to a normal life, with the loving help of a foster family who later adopted her. Zoe’s mother, sexually abused by her own father and rejected by her mother, was unable to function or to care for her children. Yet somehow, those children struggled out from that dysfunctional family. It is a depressing story – except for the message it contains: love and determination can triumph over cruelty and abuse.Told from her own point of view as she moves from childhood into adolescence, Zoe weaves throughout the book the constant refrain of “I have to put Mama first, I have to take care of her needs.” Her book helps us remember how very captive children are to their environments, and to the adults around them. As I read, I kept thinking “Zoe!! Leave!! Get out of there!” Yet what might seem to an adult like an obvious need to escape, for a child becomes the need to transform reality, and escape from a whole pattern of thinking and self-definition. When children hear, “You are stupid, you are ugly, you are bad, you are unimportant” those messages become reality, almost impossible to escape. This book is the story of Zoe’s childhood suffering, but it is also the story of her victory in transforming her childhood self. And she has told her story with honesty, and with compassion.Toward the end of the book, having finally chosen adoption by her loving foster parents, yet still struggling to move away from her biological parents and her fears, she writes, “I knew that there were parts of Mama that I couldn’t fit into my life ever again—not her abuse, nor her lies, nor her madness. But her laughter, her humor, her life and her pain would be forever in my life and heart… The screaming in my mind had stopped. I had chosen life, my life on my terms.” So, at last, the calm and loving normality of her foster family, coupled with her own intelligence and grit, enabled her to move on.The story closes with her wedding, leading to a happy marriage, and with a tribute to her loving adoptive family, to her husband, and to the others who have helped her to tell her story. So there is a happy ending, despite the very heavy odds against it. Readers will be wise to contemplate those odds, and to think how they might move to live with the same kind of love and compassion that led one child out of a childhood hell into to a happy and productive adulthood.
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful. Harrowing, moving and inspirational story By Richard Schwindt Reading and writing about family triggers much within us. Most people are associated with a family in some way, and a few of us are therapists and family therapists and therefore hear stories from individuals and families every day. This book was recommended to me as a scathingly honest account of one girl in the 60's growing up amidst chaos, abuse, fear and, in the end, hope. Zoe Niklas grew up with "Mama" - Zodie, her sister and a long series of "Daddy's", a few of whom were monsters. While she eventually finds herself embraced by a much better family, the story of her time with Zodie is harrowing and rings frighteningly true. I can see people looking at this book through many lenses: the life of the child of an alcoholic, mental health issues in women, trauma, the importance of the child welfare system, the effects of abuse through generations but I choose to see this as a story of resilience. We know that resilience in children emerges from two things: the child's recognition that the world around them is wrong, and the example of another adult demonstrating better ways to live. The presence of the loving Dimock family and subtle emanations of spirit in Zoe are what give this story such an inspirational quality. In the end, however what will remain with you is the complex characterization of Zodie, traumatized, victimized, destructive and self-destructive; a too vivid portrait of a human catastrophe. Always reliable writer Janice Harper helps tell the story with compassion, authority and simple readable prose. I will be recommending this book to many of my clients.
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful. A Journey Through Hell By Gordon S. Glasgow In 1970 I met a 17 year old girl on a ferry boat in Seattle. After a couple of meetings with her that seemed rather tense, her foster father explained to me that she was afraid of men (for good reason, I found out later) and I was scaring her. I backed off, gave it some time and offered to just be her friend. She somehow found the courage to accept that offer, and we have been good friends now for 45 years.Over the years she shared a few details of her early life, and I found out that she had experienced quite a lot of neglect and abuse. Now she has written a memoir about her childhood from age four up to her marriage.I had no idea how bad her life had been. This book is a story of horrendous neglect, abuse and traumatic experiences. It is truly gut-wrenching.But it is also a story of strength, determination and persistence in the face of amazing adversity. It shows how a few caring people can have a profound impact on a person's life, and that there is always hope. The revelations along the way reveal a lot about the dynamics of dysfunctional people and how there is usually a reason behind the dysfunction.I have had the honor of celebrating her triumphs and accomplishments along the way and coming to know her adoptive family and her husband. They are all remarkable people.I encourage you to read this book, but be prepared to be emotionally drained by the end.
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